19 August, 2013

Fall, get up, and finish


I was watching something random last night. I remember something that one of the characters said. These are not the exact words, but it goes something like this — I get scared when you make a decision because you get tempted to do whatever it takes to make that decision happen.

What I'm beginning to realize is that decisions are never objective because there will always be a play of emotions. A lot of our decisions are wildly affected by emotions. I have seen how these were used to the extreme;  sometimes emotions are used in the wrong places  and I'm pretty sure we have all seen it get the best of people. I've seen it cause heartaches, marred relationships, etc. I've developed a very fine line of emotion that I allow myself to walk on. Happiness is always allowed, but not too much because I don't want to fall off the road of reality and just stay on dream land. I also wouldn't allow extreme sadness because that can be depressing — and, it's difficult to get out of it. I have friends who have been depressed most of their lives and it's gotten to situations where they have become violent.

We all have days that we would be knocked out of a race, but we should always think that we will always be able to GET UP AND FINISH. We should not let anger get to us. Of course, this is easier said than done. I remember my friend, JAMES, who I've never seen throw a fit regardless of how bad a situation is. He is just ... so Zen. Zen people do not get angry after all. What I've learned from James is how to put on either a happy face or poker face, lace up my boots, and march on. After all,  anger won’t solve anything .

I might have gotten pragmatic through time. I learned every bit of my lessons from mid-2011 to 2012. I may have started to get an extreme pride on this mentality. Supergirls shouldn’t just lose their cool. Superwomen don’t just stoop down to levels that’s not them. I felt I was becoming a bit more like iron. Issues, troubles, sadness just started to bounce off me. I'd give myself time to sulk and get pissed, but just the right amount of time. I sometimes surprise myself, why am I not crying?

I've a rather strong personality and it’s both a blessing and a curse. I don’t want the people I love see me during my weakest moments. Last week, one of my best-est friends, JESS sent me message. She said,  "I understand. I guess it was the first time in our friendship na I couldn't do anything to protect you or to fight back for you. But I have always wished and prayed for you to get past the dark days."

It took me a while to tell her about some of my heartaches and new adventures. There was a time when I totally shut out everyone around me. Sadly yes, even my best friends. When I finally let go of that anger, I slowly got back into the groove. I felt as if I could not trust anyone. I am not in college and there is an entire department at work who depend on me. If things outside the office bother me, I cannot just go to work and look like a mess. 

Thing is,  there are situations that need you to heal and get better alone . It's not selfish. That's how you find yourself again. That's when you become whole again, as an individual. That's when you know who your true friends are.

I am strong and no matter what, I will march on with a big smile on my face ... a smile and probably a bit of iron. This is me now. Those things that I thought were bouncing off were just piling at my feet. While not looking down and doing my best to march on, I wasn’t looking down at what was piling up under me. So what happened?

And what was on the ground? What was around me? Everything I thought shook off and walked past. So on the ground I have begun to see some things. First is that a superwoman also gets hurt, but that does not make her less super. In fact, a woman is super if she has learned to manage her emotions well more times than not. She deals with her emotions. Allows herself to have the freedom to have emotion—to feel and process these emotions.

Everything has now become bright and cheerful. I am thankful for the other superwomen who understood me and gave me that freedom instead of just telling me, "I'm here for you. I will always be here for you."

Take Your Pick: Feel + Process + Experience = Breakthrough and Healing vs. Ignoring + Keeping = Turmoil and Depression

☮..Peace + ❥_Love + Good Vibes. __RUSS.


Photo Credit: CHECKER


30 comments:

Amanda T said...

I love this post. There are so many time where I feel like a quitter, but I try and find the positivity when I can.

kanishkpccoe said...

These emotions are still a virtual state of mind. Illusions! Those are created in order to feel good/bad. They don't exist unless we want them to. Well written and conveyed. Keep writing.

moses joseph said...

Yea, thats true, they are just still virtual state of mind

Julie Tucker said...

I love your post. Just recently at work I blew up. I have been there over a year and never really got mad about much. But, this one thing was really bugging and after awhile I blew up about it. Well it took the people at work about a month to start looking at me the way they normally did, as a usually calm person. Funny how one show of emotion can change the entire way people see you. Kind of harsh I think. Oh well, good post!!

Mama to 5 said...

Everything is a season, hopefully it will pass - hugs!

P Bishop said...

Thank you for sharing. Well written too. Sending good thoughts your way! Keep on keepin' on!

Karen Rodwill Solomon said...

I wish I was Zen like your friend. More people should lend a helping hand when we are in the ground looking up.

Michele D said...

Great post!
I hope that your doing better now.
Sometimes enough is enough at work and speaking up is needed. Been there myself.

Rebecca Swenor said...

I am slowly trying to change how I let things get to me. I tell people< " you can't say you had a bad day if even only one thing goes right". I have to remind myself of lil quotes like this to get through things. Thanks for sharing.

Mad Typer said...

Beautifully Written, we will always fail and fall, but we really need to learn to get up and fisnih

Cococute Manaloto said...

As they say, in every ending is another beginning comes and the sun needs to set after a tiring day but soon will rise again it is just like we people - sometimes we need space or time to relax and see what is really happening around us, failures and sadness are part of life and vital parts of being happy and successful. Sometimes we also need to shed some tears for us to empty the overflowing sadness from our eyes. Just breath in deeply and you will feel lighter when things gets heavier.

Franc said...

It's nice to have a positive outlook yet be in touch with reality. It's also important that we remain resilient in life.

Julie Jamison said...

It's important to acknowledge our weak points and not let a situation get the best of us. Anger is never pretty or classy.

Saad Ansari said...

Fail. Fail Earlier. Its really important to accept the face you've failed. That's the only way, you'll be successful in turn #2. Awesome words. :)

Leira Pagaspas said...

Totally agree with you that anger never solves anything.

Onica MommyFactor said...

It's good to get support when we're going through things in life. Glad you found your support system.

Stuck on a Cloud said...

Good or bad, Zen or not, emotions are always good to have. They keep me knowing I'm alive and human.

Joanna Sormunen said...

I think the most important thing we can do is to know ourselves. And recognizing and accepting what I feel is part of that. Then learning how to react to those feeling in a positive way, is yet another important feet to accomplish.

Aisha Kristine Chong said...

I am glad you are able to overcome things with that.

Heather Jones said...

I think it's important to keep your emotions in check, I know it's when I'm angry or sad that I make the worst decisions. Allowing myself to think and feel them before doing anything always helps. I too think anger and those negative feelings give power to things that shouldn't have them. Great post,

Jennifer Juro said...

It can be so hard to keep emotions in check sometimes!! Learning to maintain and control them can be hard sometimes

Marielle Altenor said...

My hubby is a lot like your friend James, very zen. I on the other hand am NOT lol I tend to go into crazy mode first.

Crystal Wachoski said...

I think it's great to learn to manage your emotions. It shows real emotional maturity.

Amanda || Growing Up Madison said...

I've found that having a good support team is essential to everyday living. I don't know what I'd do without those around me who are there for me.

Terri Beavers said...

What a great post and reminder that we need to keep our anger in check. That's not always easy but it's doable.

Miranda Myrabev said...

Beautiful post, I have learned over the years that it is best to cry it out and let bygones be bygones and move on for tomorrow is not guaranteed me.

NAZMA IQBAL said...

really i loved your post.i think its always important to keep going.and be confident and face every moment as it comes.

Parent Palace said...

I tend to bottle things up and then have big ole blowouts. I'm working on balance and improving my stress levels this year.

Nikki said...

I agree with Heather, sometimes when I'm angry I made a worst decision ever, and I've learned that we need to think and check our emotions. I'm so glad that you found support, love this post.

Tami said...

You are so right about anger. I use it in an attempt to get my way. All it does is make the situation worse. I'm glad I've realized this and stopped the nonsense.